Motherhood around the World – Story of Um Ala – a Jordanian mother and breadwinner

Her Dream:

“I dream that all Jordanian women will become entrepreneurs, decision makers, and productive participants either in their homes or in their local economy.”

Why she’s a hero:

Um Ala is a successful businesswoman and mother in Jordan, where female business owners are a rarity. She began her business as a side street vendor, and now owns three small grocery stores. She is her family’s primary breadwinner, and employs both her husband and sons, who support her in her business ventures. She participated in CARE’s business training project in Jordan, and now mentors other women who have joined the program.

A Chat with Hero Um Ala:

What is the POWER Project and what is your involvement in it?

The POWER project supports women who want to create their own small and micro businesses by offering financial assistance through loans. It also encourages these women to save a certain amount of money every month by creating a Savings fund. I have participated in the POWER project since its inception in 2007, where I was one of the first women who got loans and saved money. From 2007 until now, I have taken and repaid the loans on time.

How did you become the owner of a three door supermarket? Please tell us your story.

My story began in 1999. At that time, there were ten people in my household, and we only had my husband’s salary that was about 140 JDs (Jordan’s currency, dinar). My father in law wanted to sell his small store, so I bought it with 300 JDs. I made my money back the first year, and the second year, I made even more profit. Later on, I rented a new store with a larger area, and I was there until 2009.

How has expanding your business affected your family and your relationships with family members?

After expanding my work and having a bigger store, I have less time to spend with my family because the work takes a lot of my time, but I keep trying to balance between my private life and my work life.

What has it been like balancing motherhood and your career as a business owner?

The balance between the roles of mother, housewife and business women is very difficult to achieve, because of physical and mental fatigue. I open my store at 5:30 am, and stay there to 2:30 pm then I go back home to prepare food for my family, clean the house and have some rest. I come back to the store at 9:00 pm and close the store at 1:00 am

Are there any similarities in being a mother and being a business owner?

Yes, I consider my work as one of my children. It requires extra care and attention to grow and thrive. I believe that the mother’s responsibilities are similar to the businesswoman’s responsibilities to a large extent. I can tell you that during the holidays or vacations I miss my store and my work as much as I miss one of my children when he or she leaves.

You now mentor other young women who want to participate in the POWER project. Why did you decide to mentor these young women?

I started mentoring other business women in 2008, and I decided to mentor these women to encourage them to start their own businesses and become participants in the economic life and to increase their families’ incomes.

Are you more of a leader now?

After more than 10 years of continuous work, I feel that yes, I am a leader and I have a high self-esteem.
What are your next plans? Where do you see yourself in another 10 years? I plan to expand my store and increase the quantity of goods.  After 10 years, I see myself owning a big mall in my area

What advice can you give to other business woman who are not accepted or supported in their endeavors?

Try always to have a very high self-esteem, and have confidence in your decisions. In addition, do not let anything discourage or reduce your determination.

Has your role as a business owner, and now a partner with Working Women’s Society, changed how people view you and your status in society?

After the success I achieved, many of my neighbors began to believe that women are able to manage businesses successfully, and that women can be effective in increasing the family income while also balancing her roles as a mother, housewife and businesswoman.

Tell me about your most defining moment(s) in your work—what makes you most proud?

The most defining moment happened in 2009, when I expanded my store for the second time, in that time I owned a 3-door store with a wider area. Moreover, the thing that makes me proud of what I achieved are that I have improved my family’s financially situation, so I was able to buy new home furniture and buy a car, and I do my best to secure all my children’s needs.

What’s the change you’ve been able to instigate that you feel most proud of?

The biggest change was in my mental attitude. I become bolder and more integrated in society. I also became a leader and a decision maker and all of that, because I feel that I am a productive person.
Who inspires you the most in your work?

My husband. He supported me and shared all the chores and the work at the stores with me. He also keeps lifting up my spirit and encourages me to continue in my work.

What is the best lesson or advice your mother (or mother figure) ever gave you?

My mother passed away a long time ago, but I had a neighbor who was much older, and she would encourage me by telling me that by being patient, a person can achieve their dream.
What is one thing that many people don’t know about you?

I am very good at knitting woolen clothes, and most of my husband’s winter blouses are made by me. I am also very good at making pastries.

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Motherhood around the World – the double burden

I have recently been asked by a progressive women’s forum to describe how I juggle career and motherhood. Whilst I give this much needed thought, I shall provide a series of posts of women from around the world doing exactly the same thing but faced with different pressures and hardships – none of which I face, culminating with my own view point as to how I do both.

So in this first post of the series I ask -

HOW DO WOMEN AROUND THE GLOBE JUGGLE WORK AND MOTHERHOOD?

While many consider motherhood one of the world’s most important jobs, women deserve greater recognition for the challenging balance of work and motherhood. What challenges do working mothers face? How does mothers’ work affect family structures? And what systemic changes must be made for moms to get the support they need?

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Online, in cafeterias, in factories and marketplaces—at any moment, mothers across the world are telling each other stories. Often their stories are riddled with questions about everyday coping strategies: “How do I simultaneously raise children, work long hours, and run a household?” or “What time is left for me?” Many mothers feel like they are on duty day and night. [1]

The sense that mothers work incredibly hard is confirmed by global data. Women “spend an inordinate amount of time on the double burden of paid work and family responsibilities”, according to the United Nations.[2]

It’s a worldwide pattern, with women’s total work hours longer than men’s across Asia, Latin America and sub-Saharan Africa.[3] In the developed world the same pattern holds true. In Europe, North America, and other wealthy nations, women spend two-and-a-half hours more than men on unpaid work each day.[4] Additionally, the gender pay gap continues to be a problem, with women earning less than men for the same work in both developed and undeveloped countries.

Access to high-quality, affordable childcare is a top priority for working parents. It’s most available in Scandinavian countries, where gender equality also ranks high. For mothers living in countries without supportive policies, quality affordable care is often out of reach, particularly for low-income single moms.

Take, for instance, the United States, where the number of households headed by single mothers has risen dramatically over the past four decades.[5] Many of these moms stay home full time, not out of preference, but because childcare costs would eat up most, if not all, of their earnings in the absence of subsidized care.[6]

Will mothers “go on strike” and stop having babies?[7] It’s actually happening in Japan, Korea, Italy, Spain, Greece and other societies where tensions over the changing roles of women and the economics of families have yet to be reconciled.[8] Mothers are also penalized when they compete for work with childless women.  In one US study[12] researchers submitted fake resumes for two equally qualified candidates–one childless, one a mom.  They found the mother was 100% less likely to be hired when she applied for a position, and consistently ranked as less competent and less committed than non-moms.

What hasn’t changed is that women’s contribution to global productivity continues to be grossly undervalued worldwide.  Women’s unpaid work at home and outside the home contributes a staggering one third of the world ‘s GDP by one estimate.[9]

Even as the mamas of the world struggle, global leaders are belatedly recognizing that investing in them is a win-win proposition.

Michelle Bachelet, ex-President of Chile, is now championing their cause[10] as the head of UN Women. Bachelet, a single mother of three, has added the double burden to her equality agenda.[11]

With these disturbing realities in mind, the old adage “A mother’s work is never done” bears more truth than it should.

An article taken from the International Museum of  Women – Motherhood around the World http://imow.org/home/index

[1] Sleep Medication: Mother’s New Little Helper, New York Times, Accessed 10 November 2011

[2] The World’s Women 2010: Trends and Statistics, United Nations Statistics Division, Accessed 10 November 2011

[3] The State of the World’s Children, 2007, Women and Children, The Double Dividend of Gender Equality, UNICEF, Accessed 10 November 2011

[4] Women Lead in Unpaid Work, Economix Blog, New York Times, Accessed 10 November 2011

[5] U.S. Children in Single-Mother Families, Population Reference Bureau, Accessed 10 November 2011

[6] The Three Faces of Work-Family Conflict: The Poor, the Professionals, and the Missing Middle, Center for American Progress, Accessed 10 November 2011

[7] Mommy’s on strike? Working Moms Break, Blog by Katrina Alcorn, Accessed 10 November 2011

[8] No Babies? Russell Shorto, New York Times, Accessed 10 November 2011

[9] Invest in Women – It Pays! Women Deliver, Accessed 10 November 2011

[10] Michelle Bachelet at the ILO Conference: The elimination of gender discrimination is a matter of “smart economics”, ILO Press Release June 10, 2011, Accessed 1 November 2011

[11] Beyond the Gender Gap: Latin American and Caribbean Women in Search of a New Balance, World Bank Press Release on Study Launch with the Participation of UN Women Executive Director Michelle Bachelet, 25 October 2011, Accessed on 22 November 2011

[12] The Motherhood Penalty: Working Moms Face Pay Gap Vs. Childless Peers, Bloomberg Businessweek, Accessed 10 November

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Behind closed doors – no-one really knows – the truth about PND

I have been reading about Felicia Boots this week with a great sense of sadness and sympathy.  The loss of two small children is an awful thing and I am usually at one with the voices who are outraged when small lives are lost in awful circumstances. But having suffered heinous post natal depression (PND)  following the birth of my daughter, I understand the sheer pain and isolation a mother can feel and how desperate one can be.  Whilst I never came close to where Felicia must have been, I recall never wanting to getting dressed, crying intermittently and feeling that I would never have control again. Second time round is a vastly different story for me and having been there and done it once, have felt, to the extent one can, in control but after Princess A, I really was in despair and did not let anyone, even his nibs help me. On the surface, as with Felicia Boots, all was fine – the world never knew and yet, in my heart, I felt a constant sickness and a feeling that things would never be the same again and felt that for at least 13 months.

I remember someone telling me that professional women who had children at a later age had a greater proclivity to PND than other mothers – I am not sure that is necessarily true.  Whoever you are, becoming a mother is such a life changing event that PND can affect anyone, at whatever age. Granted, I had been marvelously selfish and had a great career and suddenly I was dictated by the needs of small being who I could not understand.

I do not know what Felicia went through and the abject misery that made her suffocate her children. It is so sad that it was not identified sooner but with everyone so desperate to show that there are no chinks in the armour and that life is perfection, one cannot always see these things.  In front of the world, all can be normal but behind closed doors, there can be pain that is inexplicable and whilst I am so sad for Felicia, her husband and the babies that never really saw life, I am pleased that I somehow pulled myself together and now look at my children with tears of love and joy and not sadness or resentment.  What I do know is that many women do suffer from PND and that sadly budget cuts for post natal care means that such matters are not being identified as much as they should be.  PND really must be taken more seriously.

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Not racism – merely fact..

So again another Asian gang has been found guilty of grooming and “trafficking” young women – mostly non Asian. Whilst I have no sympathies with the British National Party and their view on this situation, there does seem an intrinsic issue with regard to Asian (mostly Muslim) men grooming young girls and trafficking them in the community.  I refer to my previous article on this – http://sharonbenningprince.com/articles-events/home-grown-trafficking/ where I note that home grown trafficking gangs are becoming somewhat prolific.  Even Asian community leaders are noting that there is a cultural dichotomy within the community and the treatment of women.   The article below by Nigel Bunyan provokes certain thought and this is an issue that needs to be objectively reviewed without the mantle of racism confusing the matter.

As an aside but related point, I am also pleased and privileged to have been asked to be a co-producer on a UN anti-trafficking film - a hope that more awareness will be raised. And I also salute Chris Hurrey who recently gave a series of talks on border issues, including trafficking –  to audiences on their cruise ship holiday - not light after-dinner entertainment certainly but a brave and again awareness raising task – thank you Chris.

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Nigel Bunyan, The Telegraph – 8th May

In recent years police forces and social work departments across Britain have   generally failed to tackle it for fear of being seen as racist.

Instead, they have cited official figures that paint a more generalised   picture of sex gangs springing up in a variety of ethnic communities.

But the reality is that in pockets across Britain vulnerable white teenagers   are being groomed and then trafficked to satisfy the cravings of Asian men,   the vast majority of them Pakistani.

Experts in the field point out that in general white paedophiles operate in   isolation. The new, Asian-led grooming is being done mostly by large numbers   of men acting as a group.

Such men regard their victims with contempt – “easy” girls, often in care or   on `at risk` registers, whose early isolation from school and family has   already turned them to drink, drugs or both.

One of the men on trial in Liverpool summed up this attitude when he said:   “You white people train them in sex and drinking, so when they come to us   they are fully trained”.

Like others in the gang, he saw nothing wrong with plying victims with drink   and then forcing them to have sex. As he told Girl A: “I gave you vodka, now   it’s your turn to give me something”.

Others have told their victims it is alright to sleep with them “because it’s   what we do in our country”.

Nazir Afzal, the chief prosecutor for the CPS in the North West, happens to be   a British-born Pakistani. He was also the man who reversed the original,   flawed decision not to prosecute two members of the gang in 2009-2010.

His team has dealt with a number of Asian-led grooming gangs in the past, and   there are two more trials scheduled for later in the year.

But of the Liverpool defendants he insists: “These men are not defined by   their race; they are defined by their attitude to young girls. They almost   feel they have a right to control these young girls because no one else   will.

“But they do it for their own nefarious purposes. These poor girls are evil   prey for evil men”.

Mr Afzal suggests that young Asian girls may also be suffering abuse but feel   unable to report it.

Ann Cryer, the former MP for Keighley, who first came across the issue nearly   a decade ago, believes the practice of arranged marriages may also have a   bearing on the issue.

This, she says, is because such marriages often involve the arrival in Britain   of young, uneducated young men suddenly transplanted from remote villages in   Pakistan.

While the age of consent is the same in Pakistan as it is in Britain, girls   can be marry in the former as soon as they reach puberty.

Immigrants from elsewhere in the world – Ireland, Italy, China and Poland, for   example – have tended to marry within their own settled communities.

But among Pakistanis there is still a pressure to find future partners in the   subcontinent.

Mrs Cryer said: “I understand the Koranic advice on arranging marriages, in   other words that the young men and women involved should be appropriate.

“But when you start bringing young people in from Pakistan who perhaps haven’t   been to school, have no English, have led very sheltered lives in Pakistan,   and then you bring them over and expect them to have a successful marriage,   well it’s not working.

“Perhaps it’s time for the Pakistani community to spend time in seeking out   appropriate Muslim partners within Britain.”

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Leaving Britain

So I read that 42% of Britons would “seriously consider” emigrating; 6% are “actively planning or considering. 52% see the cost of living as a reason to move abroad while 37% say the weather.

His nibs and I often flirted with the idea of moving abroad but having done a few short stints of work in foreign climates, one office certainly looks the same, whatever country you are in!  However this last week again, I have been getting itchy feet.  The weather has been awful and I saw pictures of friends in Oz looking relaxed, hiking and biking near still waters and my first thoughts were – get TD a passport, sell house, cash-in and up sticks and go to ………. but where? So this is the quiz game that his nibs and I played for a very long time and our choices of living abroad destinations became fewer and fewer.  Whilst Europe is perfectly lovely, his nibs would certainly not want to learn another language and whilst France, Spain or Italy may seem attractive, every indigenous person of those countries does not really seem to be that enamoured by the economic reality of those said countries and I can only stand so much bureaucracy of having to get things done!

So further afield.. the USA, Canada – yes these were always in our top 5 destinations and pre-kids were attractive countries, especially the USA but yet so far away from family and friends and also becoming horribly expensive. What I do still love about the USA is that you can really still achieve there and that ambition is not a dirty word as at times in can be construed to be here in the UK. But then do I want Princess A to become a 90210 brat?

Argh so around the globe we go…. India – crazy – Oxford Street on Christmas Eve every day – even that would be too much for me. China.. no the language thing again. Australia and NZ – also getting pricier and we would never see my friends and especially my family given my father finds it hard enough to get in the car to come up the M3!! The middle east – in seriousness – his nibs has been suggesting Lebanon. He has family there – it is party central but I am not sure. So round and round the globe goes and we come to…… that small island where my grandparents trekked to back in the 60s and where his nibs’ Lebanese grandmother came a year after the second world war.  England oh England – you do have your faults but I suspect it is much like any other country in the world. The weather can be rubbish, life can be hard it seems but not any more so than anywhere else in the world. Going on holiday is one thing but reality is another. People I know and love are here - and it becomes harder after children as you want to be close to family and the children become settled and happy in their lives. Also I am familiar with England and its foibles and I really would not want to swap my office overlooking the garden – well maybe for one overlooking the sea.  That being said, Princess A and TD love the outdoors and with Princess A’s imminent volleyball trial I may yet be trawling the world after her. But in truth, I love England although on occasion do agree with the 11% who think that “British people” are a good reason to leave Britain!! But even that, for me, is not enough to entice me away.

Are you part of the 42% ? – comment and let me know. Upping sticks or like to stay put?

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Inspirational Women and in the Boardroom

So dinner at Hoxton Apprentice again overwhelmed me http://www.hoxtonapprentice.com/. The food exquisite and the force of Lady Val Corbett is something to behold. I certainly want to be her when I grow up! I have been thinking greatly about inspirational people lately and what it means to be an inspiration. This has somewhat been triggered by someone I know being asked to be part of an inspirational people article.  Now whilst I acknowledge this person’s endeavours in certain areas of her life, I was confused by the inspirational part. There are so many phenomenal people doing life changing things that it amazes me that they are not recognised for their efforts. One such person is Angela  Edmondson and her charitable efforts at www.diversityincare.org. A single mother and a someone who gives everything of herself to help abused women and is also helping with my trafficking awareness raising. A truly formidable and certainly inspirational woman.  Another is Tanya Rennick of the Oyster Club  – www.theoysterclub.co.uk  - another single mother who has experienced some hair-raising things in her life but now does it her way – by her own rules - and has succeeded  and now also wants to assist suppressed women.

I believe that being inspirational means different things to different people. Certainly I am inspired by those who, even a small way, are trying to change the world for the better and do it in spite of the mechanics of every day living.

Others who inspire me are women attempting to enter the boardroom and again this was a source of conversation last night. It is getting better- slowly – but the article below written by Kate Meeves at Shoosmiths indicates the progress forward.

Are women “on board” yet? Lord Davies publishes a progress report

Last year Lord Davies reviewed female representation on corporate boards and   recommended that 25% of FTSE 250 directors should be women by 2015. An update on   progress to date has just been published.

Lord Davies’ report recommended that FTSE 250 companies should aim for at   least 25% female representation on their boards by 2015. For FTSE 100   companies this target was regarded as a minimum goal.

Since the report was published last February it appears that female   representation on listed company boards has increased, but there is clearly   still some way to go:

  • 47 female appointments have been made at FTSE 100 companies in the last year   so that women now account for 15.6% of all directorships (up   from 12.5%).
  • 11 all-male boards remain in the FTSE 100, down from 21.
  • 53 female appointments have been made within the FTSE 250 in the last year   so that women now account for 9.6% of all directorships (up   from 7.8%).
  • 112 (44.8%) all-male boards remain in the FTSE 250, down from   52.4%.

The first recommendation in Lord Davies’ original report was that all FTSE   350 companies should announce their aspirational goals for the percentage of   women they aim to have on their boards by 2013 and 2015 by September 2011. However, to date, only 38 FTSE 100 companies and 34 FTSE 250 companies have done   so.

The regulatory framework

For financial years beginning on or after 1 October this year, the amended  Corporate Governance Code will require listed companies to explain their policy   on diversity and report on how it is being implemented in their annual reports. Companies will also be required to consider diversity, including but not limited   to gender, when evaluating the effectiveness of the board. The Financial   Reporting Council is encouraging all companies to disclose this information   voluntarily in annual reports published during 2012.

Investors

Investors are becoming increasingly engaged on diversity issues. The   Association of British Insurers announced in February 2011 that it would review   what listed companies where doing in respect of board effectiveness and the role   diversity plays in this, board evaluation and proper succession planning.

In November 2011 the National Association of Pension Funds (NAPF) updated its   own corporate governance policy to state that it now expects boards to set out   an explicit policy for achieving greater diversity and to track the   effectiveness of that policy. Where this is not done the NAPF policy says   shareholders should consider voting against the re-election of the Chairman of   the Nominations Committee.

The European dimension

In March 2011 the EU Justice Commissioner launched the “Women on the Board   Pledge for Europe”, asking all European listed companies to commit to increasing   the presence of women on their boards to 30% by 2015 and 40% by 2020. However,   the European Commission has recently confirmed that just 24 companies across   Europe have so far signed up to the pledge. Earlier this month, the Commission   launched a consultation on possible legislative action at EU level to redress   the continuing gender imbalance on corporate boards in Europe and this is open   until 28 May 2012. Following this, the Commission is expected to take a decision   on further action later in the year, and therefore the possibility of mandatory   quotas for female directors being imposed on UK companies by the EU remains.

The public sector

By way of contrast, the Government has set itself the goal that women will   comprise 50% of all new appointments to boards of public bodies by the end of   the current Parliament. A new code of practice for making such appointments   will come into effect on 1 April 2012.

Comment

Diversity is now firmly on the corporate agenda and listed companies can no   longer afford to drag their feet given regulatory requirements and increased   investor scrutiny. There is a real risk that mandatory quotas for female   directors could be imposed if the pace of progress does not visibly   increase.

While female representation is currently the focus, diversity is about more   than gender and companies should consider the issue in the round. Identifying   where there are talent blockages or high attrition rates internally may be the   first step in developing strategies to increase the variety of the talent pool   for the future.
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10 year anniversary salute to friends

His nibs and I are blessed – truly we are. On Saturday we partied with four of our most favourite couples. The restaurant, L’Oranger was incredible and the company perfect. The sort of evening where you leave with a massive smile on your face. As  I looked around the table on Saturday evening, I saw the faces of friends that have been with us for the whole ten years of our marriage, if not more and we recounted tales of times before children when it all seemed so easy.   It was amazing to see the women with whom I have laughed and cried become incredible “adult” women and mothers, with whom I have danced on tables and donned fancy dress and love so dearly and whose children are like my own.

The delicious “Dutchess” Wiljo, who seemed formidable to me when I first met her (I with my afro wig – she in 60s mini dress – it was a match made in heaven) in some random club in Watford, who will also be celebrating her 10th anniversary with “Doc” who is one of his nibs’ most loyal friends and how they love a cheeky five minutes together! We have seen them radiant at their wedding, celebrated their babies and who are generous in their love.

As are Mike and saucy Sal – again stalwart friends – ready with eggs and two deliciously mischievous boys and always sound wise words when needed. Again nearly 10 year veterans in marriage and with whom we have laughed literally to the point of pants wetting and only Mike holds the crown of sleeping with my toilet for a whole night - a privileged toilet indeed!

And then the crazy, zany Mahalinghams and Nita baby with whom I have danced on tables and boogied  many a night away with.  And again who is now a mother of three and yet full of laughter and fun and always hosts fabulous xmas bashes and only Shiv could make a bandanna around his ripped jeans look cool.

And finally P and U who stumbled upon us and actually never wanted to meet us as we were a “boring lawyer/accountant couple” but who are now omnipresent in our lives and teach us so many things and can always liven up a Saturday, especially after a wine or two.

Friendships and loyalty are such precious commodities. His nibs and I have friends that span a whole lifetime, from childhood, university, work who have seen us through a myriad of things.  As twee as it is,  money cannot buy the feeling in one’s heart in knowing that you have people around you who care about you – even when life gets busy – and children and other suddenly feature.  The eight at dinner on Saturday are part our special sanctum, of whom there are a few others, especially my lovely single gals, Marti, Han, Hils, Wend and Auntie T and no-one can replace them. I hope that Princess A and TD are also blessed in finding such amazing friendships – they can never be taken away.  So this is my salute to good friends – until death may us part!

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A pain in the head – Glass ceiling in law firms – Article by Chrissie Lightfoot – 12 April 2012

Chrissie Lightfoot is the chief executive of legal consultancy EntrepreneurLawyer and author of the book ‘The Naked Lawyer: RIP to XXX – How to Market, Brand and Sell YOU!’

‘Don’t mind me, I just like legs,’ crooned the male partner to the female trainee lawyer perched nervously on his office sofa. Placing a sweaty hand just above her silky knee, he provocatively slid his fingers down to her ankle and slowly back again. Stroking and caressing continually — he then proceeded to take her through the finer details of boiler clauses and bespoke terms. This is not an overwrought passage from a romance novel designed to get the heartbeats of middle-aged housewives racing. Or indeed a pastiche of America’s latest television craze, Mad Men. It is instead the kind of scene that is still regularly played out in the offices of business law firms — along with a host of other ‘hushed up’ behaviour.
Cracks in the ceiling
Several years ago I conducted some research that resulted in a thesis entitled ‘Relative work, relative leisure; women entrepreneurs in the 1990s’. In it, I firmly concluded that there was no such thing as the glass ceiling. If women were prepared to work thrice as hard, make the right bold choices, bring about the necessary changes in behaviour and ultimately take control of their career journeys, then they could, quite simply, shatter the glass ceiling. I was wrong. My research was flawed. I’d failed to interview women in the legal profession. Also, at that time, I’d never worked in it myself, witnessed what actually goes on or met the hoards of highly talented ladies who suffer from sexual harassment, bullying, ‘professional prejudice’ and ‘baby prejudice’. Those who dare to complain endure the daily patronising, megalomaniac, egotistical old boys’ club mantra of ‘if you want to get on in this firm you’d better shut up and wise up’.  In a legal world where clients and prospective clients are being entertained in lap dancing bars and schmoozed by high class escorts to ‘seal the deal’, it’s not uncommon for women lawyers attempting to scale the corporate ladder in London, New York, Sydney and elsewhere to be stone-walled and ostracised in conversations and meetings with male colleagues while they guffaw in their deliberations over which strip (or sex) club their clients would prefer.

Problems and solutions
But should this be the attitude and behaviour we’re proud of as a profession and business?  Do all male lawyers behave in this way? Unlikely. Do all female lawyers endure and/or tolerate this kind of behaviour by their male (or female) colleagues? Again, unlikely. Yet, when I recently posed the question ‘does the glass ceiling exist in our beloved business of law?’ to many female lawyers, the overwhelming response was typified by one reaction. It came from a female city lawyer who has managed to claw her way to partnership in a global law firm, and who also witnesses the daily prejudice against her female assistants and associates. She admitted with a pained expression: ‘I didn’t think it existed…but it does.’ So is there a problem? Yes, definitely. Is there a solution? Yes, there’s always a solution if we — men and women — are prepared to put our egos, ignorance, arrogance and prejudice aside. In an earlier article I shared the thoughts and predictions from leading futurologists that the world is moving towards a networked global society, typified by hyper-collaboration, return on involvement, an appreciation by clients of emotional intelligence, the importance of human brand, interaction before transaction and a desire for legal advice based on emotion. Arguably, these are just the type of skills in which women lawyers, women partners and women in boardrooms naturally excel; for example, communication, conversation, engagement, involvement, emotion, empathy and relationship marketing (networking).
Girl power
Female entrepreneurs — buyers of legal services – currently account for approximately a third of all entrepreneurs worldwide, and the US Census Bureau predicts that by the year 2025, the share of women entrepreneurship in that country will increase to more than 55 per cent. And the UK-based futurist, Rohit Talwar, predicted in a recent report that by the year 2020, 20 per cent of the US working-age population will be self-employed entrepreneurs. Where America leads in business, the rest of the world eventually catches up. Therefore, taking account of trends regarding the number of female entrepreneurs worldwide, we’d be wise to temper our attitudes, behaviour and prejudice towards women lawyers. We’d be foolish to ignore the fact that we need talented women in the business of law. Why? In a networked society and collaborative world where trust, relationships, emotion and humanness are currency, where the number of present and future women clients is set to increase, where clients do business with those they know, like, trust, understand and share common interests; where clients buy legal advice on the basis of emotion, and justify that purchase with logic, it’s a no-brainer. Fortunately, in adversity there is always opportunity.

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Women in the forces – a view from Canada

Interestingly I have always thought of Canada as being a forward thinking country in terms of women and rights – seemingly not. A very interesting response written by my Canadian cousin – Veena Hayer – to the statement set forth below.

Women in wrong line of work www.langleyadvance.com.  The problem with women in the RCMP is the women in the RCMP. There shouldn’t be any.

So I was angered after reading this individual’s letter to the editor (see link). I have sent in my reply letter to the newspaper, but if it doesn’t get posted, here it is: This letter is in response to James Charles, ‘Women in wrong line of work”. Firstly, it is not ‘political correctness’ to have females in the force. Mr. Charles’ comment is so blantely ignorant, that is likely why it was printed—to get a reaction. Well yes, I have a very strong reaction. The women who serve and protect everyday, just like their male counterparts, are in fact skilled, physically strong, tactical, and committed to keeping our communities safe. ALL recruits must pass a medical exams, including physical, dental, hearing, vision, psychological and laboratory tests required by RCMP. Common sense alone, would tell you that if police officers are hired on their rigorously tested merit, the women who meet these high standards have every right to be a part of the police force, and it is for our benefit that they are. It is unfortunate Mr. Charles that you may feel intimidated or insecure about the fact that woman hold positions of authority, not only in policing or the military, but also as Directors, Scholars, Lawyers and Doctors (to name a few). But get use to it, Stats Canada 2011 reports that the proportion of female officers is 20%, and the number is steadily rising, particularly in your home province of BC. Women who hold the rank of Constable has grown to 22% as well. Let me re-iterate, this is not political correctness, this is accomplished members of our community doing valuable work….let me take this moment to thank both our male and female police officers in the force.

 

 

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Is it that bad growing old? B and H

Like this post from Dr Terry – http://www.drterry.com/it-bad-growing-old

Growing old gracefully seems to be a thing of the past as more and more men and women turn to cosmetic surgery in an attempt to turn back the clock. Looking young seems to be the most important thing that people want to do today and they will spend a fortune not only on surgery but on all the cosmetic products that are available. It has become a huge multi-billion dollar business that many people and companies have cashed in on and with online marketing today it reaches people all over the globe.

Gone are the days of letting your hair gradually turn to grey and slipping comfortably into mid life without a care in the world. Today we are expected to look fit and healthy at 50 plus and this applies to men as well as women.

Television adverts tempt us with products that will keep the wrinkles at bay and improve our skin tone, made out of natural ingredients that will work miracles. These concoctions are not cheap but we are prepared to pay for them because we are told that they will work.

We are conditioned into thinking that we must remain young looking no matter what it costs us.

But is it all that bad growing old? The answer is no, it is not. The idea of not having to worry so much about our appearance should make life that much easier for us. Life at a slower pace should be appealing not something to be dreaded. People should be able to feel good about their wrinkles and lines or their slightly sagging skin. They should be able to feel proud of the older image that they have acquired with the passing of time. It all adds to the character that we have built up over the years.

At twenty one our adult life is just beginning then at thirty we are getting ourselves settled in the life that we have chosen. Hitting forty used to be thought of reaching the top of the hill and getting to fifty we were going downhill all the way.

With so much that can be done to the human body to slow the ageing process down we are simply kidding ourselves with an outer shell appearance of youth because inside each of us the clock has ticked on like a metronome. Yes it is true that when we look good on the outside we may feel a little better about ourselves but this is only a temporary fix.

Growing old is a matter of life and it should be approached with fun and relaxation just as nature intended us to do. With so much peer pressure it is hard not to fall prey the cosmetic surgeon’s knife but then where do we stop? We cannot change the clock back and in the end we will just have to accept that growing old gracefully is a nice thing to do. We can help ourselves a little by taking care of ourselves as best we can but at the end of the day we will just have to accept that time stands still for no man.

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